1011. Horrors of Spider Island (1960)

Girls on a deserted isle? A Dude Vanishes? Oh Gilligan!!! Spiders, insects, creepy crawlies, PAGING JOHN GOODMAN!!! Regular size, super size, Jeff Goldblum, bugs are popular. Some like the legs, the body, a bunch, or wave the white flag. Mosquitos, flies, bees, whether Vincent Price or Michael Caine WATCH OUT!!! Crow’s Column, A Monkey License, Giant Spider Web, Auditions, Mike Crashing The SOL. “Give us a chance to sit down”, “It’s an anagram for A Bra Bra Navel Night”, “Ah a Temple Foster… Where they worship Australian Beer.” “Good chest rubbing weather” or “Red Lobster Snowcrabs finally strike back!!!”?

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Note: Horrors of Spider Island (1960) also goes by A Corpse Hung in the Web, It’s Hot in Paradise, Girls of Spider Island, Horror On the Spider Island, and Spider’s Web.

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Mike Crashes The SOL.

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There’s some great lines in this one-

“I wasn’t even being sexy until the dirty sax music started.”

“And another actor flees the film.”

Love this episode.

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Puts his feet up and crosses his legs

Who doesn’t like watching a bunch of nippleless women lounge around all long grass (bonus points if you get that) after stock footage of a plane crash? This movie is so ridiculous that it’s perfect riffing fodder. The silly auditions, the super subtle fanservice, the way all the women are more excited to have those schlubs around than to be rescued, Gary!, and the rest. They get a lot of mileage out of this silly adolescent doodle-in-the-back-of-a-notebook, and as an episode it goes down smooth.

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The music so pushes the incompetence. The carefree vibe during dramatic moments tunes us in to how scatterbrained this is. What a beautiful riffing vessel of a flick.

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This movie started as a “stag” film but the was edited and retitled in an attempt to get a larger market.

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Ever wonder what Gilligan’s Island would have been like if all the characters were variants on Ginger and Mary Ann? This is one of the less pleasant renditions of that concept. It’s reputed that the original European cut has a fair bit of straight up nudity. All American audiences get are a few long shots of some skinny-dipping.

The aspect that bugs me the most is the walla, which is just distracting. As with any other background sound in a movie, walla should enhance a scene rather than draw attention to itself.

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Gary certainly belongs in the MST3K hall of oily, unlikable characters.

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Oh god this movie is awful.

But it’s redeemed by one riff that I’ll probably slightly mangle:
“I was going to be faithful, but it’s like 80 degrees out”

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Spidey Hickey.

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I’m not a fan of the Sherwood Schwartz-verse and even I’m offended by such a cruel comparison! The women of his multi-verse are like Jane Austen characters in comparison to anyone in this over-brined turkey! Tsk!

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No one could ever accuse Tina Louise of depth, but at least she was two dimensional.

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But how’d she feel about Harold Stassen? (Yes, that was my favorite riff in the whole damn episode and I’ve only ever been to Minnesota once.)

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Interesting that this is (for now!) the last B&W movie featured.

As you know, I’m a sucker for running gags and I rather like their melodramatic booming of “THE HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND!!!” whenever something not very “Horror”-like is happening (like during the extremely long audition sequence).

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The movie was pretty much begging for that riff, considering it yelled the tile at us before the guys even had a chance to sit down.

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This might be the most misogynistic movie they’ve ever riffed. (And there’s a lot of stiff competition out there.) The women are all catty and useless and can’t function without a man telling them what to do.

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I couldn’t agree more. Especially Bobby. He’s the poster boy for misogyny. This movie seems pretty racy for 1960. Lots of women running around without tops on. My favorite part of this episode is that Tom passes out twice because of the sexiness! Flesh!
I like this one. This movie gives them plenty to riff and they knock it out of the park. And when the movie reveals one of the girls is from Minnesota, they jump right on it!

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Think of what it would’ve added if just ONE of them kept losing stuff in her oversized purse. Or if one of them carried a forked stick and whined, “I hope a tree falls on you!” So many great cinematic possibilities just… scuttled. :cry:

Related:

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Hi! Do you like my transition lenses, Gary?

A masterpiece! The high art of Terpsichore, the high fashion of kicky neckerchiefs, and love!

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