I may only be a level 1 druid with a +1 Staff of Deep Hurting, but I’m ready to fight a few Orcs. Who’s with me?
6 Likes
6 Likes
You have been eaten by a grue.
5 Likes
I’m a level 10 bard. I think I will stay at Ye Olde Inne, have some ale, and write a song about how you valiantly died while fighting a grue.
4 Likes
But I just got here!
5 Likes
Well, next time, “light lamp” first, then ask “Who’s with me?” 
5 Likes
I thought my glowing sword would be enough!
2 Likes
Look, if I have to roll a whole new character, can I at least get an attack badger this time?
3 Likes
Your character sheet clearly states “+1 Staff of Deep Hurting”. You should have known that a Staff of Deep Hurting attracts grues.
4 Likes
[gets out GM screen] Alright, who’s playing?
4 Likes
I was all set to raid a dungeon, but then I died of dysentery.
6 Likes
My barbarian became confused and punched the old man that asked if I was looking for adventure. Long story short, the inn is in flames and I’m now on the run.
5 Likes
<<Semi-comatose Elvish Ranger gropes about on the ground for something to sate his “Mad Munches”>>
3 Likes
I’m a level 9 Bootblack. I like it very much.
5 Likes
Your staff of deep hurting doesn’t inflict hurt onto enemies, instead it inflicts hurt on it’s bearer by the use of corny jokes.
However, through great diligence and resolve, you have leveled up 5 lvls by bearing through the pain.
You also found a karaoke machine with public domain songs fully loaded onto it.
2 Likes
This little duck thing keeps chasing me around. It claims it’s a dragon, but I’m not buying it. Any advice?
6 Likes
Who didn’t clean up last week’s Mountain Dew spill? The dice are getting stuck to the table.
3 Likes
Feed it the key!
4 Likes
This always cracks me up:
4 Likes
Hadn’t seen that one before. Hilarious.
2 Likes