Explain a Plot Using Haiku?

I’ve been enjoying the Explain an Episode Plot Badly topic that @Humbledstone posted, and I thought of another way to play. What if we summarized episodes/movies via haiku? This about it, won’t you? Thank you!

Won essay contest
But unhappy in his work
Accused his parents

Dune buggies go Wheeee
So honk if you love Eegah
And watch out for snakes

Horny judge is duped
Exploited kids eat dog food
Mamie sings oobles

Velvet Fog’s a dink
Anka appeases stalker
Mamie loves church jail

Aboard Southern Sun
Sting, Debbie Reynolds, and God
Hardcheese and Kalgan

Do a lot of coke
And vote for Ronald Reagan
Exploding puppets

It’s absolutely
Fascinating when you turn
Into a war-wilf


10 posts were merged into an existing topic: MST3K Haiku Thread