Only 20 minutes? That is a bug, it’s supposed to be 2 hours. Thanks for bringing it to our attention. We’ll get on it right away!
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Ah, yeah, apparently the video fluid has a habit of reproducing. Happened with The Bubble too. Means you’re here with us longer, so we don’t care!
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Anyone know what happens when you drop Mentos into video fluid? I’m keen to try it, but I don’t want to blow up my garage in the process.
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That was the real origin of Munchie, as seen in Botticelli’s most famous painting.
So, yeah. You might want to wait on this a while longer. By which I mean forever.
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Ah, that would be why I seem to have two different copies of The Mask. One’s flatter than the other though and I think it might have spilled.
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Oh, no, one of the interns spiked the tank for The Mask. Since nobody died when we put it in the projector, we called it a gimmick and went on with our day.
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My complaint for this week is that Mike Nelson looked kinda’ sunburned the other day. I don’t think you should let him stay under the sun lamp all day when he visits.
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I regret to inform you that we do not have sunscreen or an atmosphere on the moon.
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Poor Mike. His complexion must suffer so we can be happy. 
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It could have been caused by microwave radiation from his kitchen broadcast area.
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This grocery store won’t let me buy a vowel.
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Vowels are sold in the gift shop. Mostly As so you can hang your screams of horror on your living room wall like you’ve always wanted to.
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Finally a salesperson who understands my needs!!!
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I called Freddie Freaker the other day, and now he broke in, kept telling me to buy his shtuff, and won’t leave me alone. Ugh, “$2 a call” my ass!
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We are not responsible for ill-advised use of cell phones. We are responsible for guests ruining the movie experience.
We pay them $2.50 an hour.
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It’s making that noise again
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Noise has been made louder.
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Ah! Thank you
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… we have noise now?
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YES WE HAVE NOISE NOW. WE THANK YOU FOR LISTENING.
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