Five Word Summaries

In the same vein as the MST3K Haiku Thread and Explain a MST3K episode plot badly, this one’s pretty simple: Summarize a riffed movie in five words or fewer.

It Conquered the World
Yeah … it totally didn’t.

10 Likes

Doctor Mordrid

Doctor Strange on pocket change.

15 Likes

Killer Shrews
Shrews! Drink. Build escape tanks.

10 Likes

Manos
The dad is so stupid.

Giant Leeches
Just guys in trash bags.

11 Likes

The Starfighters
Insomnia cure: detasseling and refueling.

9 Likes

Monster a Go-Go
More like “Monster No Show.”

12 Likes

Revenge of the Creature

Greasy Agar rictus, short shorts.

8 Likes

Secret Agent Super-Dragon

Damn I’m Smug. Mmm hmmm…

10 Likes

Lost Continent

Rock climbing.

9 Likes

Land That Time Forgot
Doug McClure eats dinosaur meat

8 Likes

Colossus and the Headhunters

My Cheesesteak pretends he’s Hercules.

6 Likes

Monster A-Go-Go

Entire movie that doesn’t happen.

10 Likes

Beyond Atlantis
It’s mothercrabbers vs. manperms. Daaaaahhhhhh!

8 Likes

The Castle of Fu Manchu
Racist, boring, and really bad.

Red Zone Cuba
Holy crap, this guy’s crazy!

8 Likes

Alternatively,

Poopy suit aerial refuelling propaganda

7 Likes

The Horror of Party Beach
What the fark is that?!

Beginning of the End
Bugs crawl around on postcards.

8 Likes

Time of the Apes
Catherine gasps, Johnny doesn’t care.

9 Likes

Cry Wilderness
Animals dealt with later. Bigfoot.

8 Likes

Danger!! Death Ray

Heavy spy intrigue, light jazz.

9 Likes

The Beast of Hollow Mountain
Cattle rustling, and eventually, dinosaur.

9 Likes