Who should Gamera battle?
Gamera vs. Cornjob!
Gamera vs. Grogu aka baby Yoda aka the child
Gamera vs. Chase.
The Gila Monster was Gamera’s cousin and he wants payback.
Abortion law, obvs, everyone’s first thought. Second is copyright law.
Gamera, in therapy on a couch, battling himself. Not a lot of action but probably some deep psychological issues in there.
Also, I’d love to see a comprehensive documentary including interviews with the lawyers about the feud between Best Brains and Sandy Frank. I know for several years on YouTube any posted Gamera or other Sandy Frank films (Time of the Apes, Star Force Fugitive Alien) were almost immediately kicked offline by lawyers. And obviously the season 2 Godzilla treatments have practically disappeared despite being really funny.
Gamera vs. Kramer
Either a Seinfeld crossover or Gamera getting a divorce, your choice.
Or we could go with Gamera’s war on pornography with Gamera vs. Larry Flint.
The Night of the Lepus rabbits. Tortoise vs. hare action!
Gamera vs. El Santo! Naturally Gamera will have to don a mask for this epic battle.
Won’t people mistake him for one of those masked turtles in New York?
I think he should battle that Doctor of Old Woman-ology from The Leech Woman. Or the ineffectual hypnotist guy from The She-Creature.
I mean, Gamera’s basically like a giant, amphibious version of Zorba The Greek. His athleticism and cool dance moves, his zeal for justice, his lust for life and/or fossil fuel… If anyone could snap those sad ambulatory dishrags out of their Not Acting Mode, it’d be him!
Also, maybe Peter Graves. They could end up joining forces and ol’ Pete could ride off into the sunset on Gamera’s back. That guy’s always too serious. He needs to loosen up!
It Conquered The World version, Beginning of the End version or Parts: The Clonus Horror version?
The first one, so we can work in Graves singing the “We’re gonna’ ride our bicycles…”
Peter Graves learned almost too late that Gamera is passionate creature, and because of it, the greatest friend to all children. He learned too late for himself that giant rubber monsters must fight each other, and do it goofily.
SST: Death Flight version