Geteven AKA The Road to Revenge

Several years ago, one of my college friends invited a bunch of us over to her house to watch bad movies, as she’d done several nights before. But this time was different. She found a movie through a clip posted online; I want to say it might have been in an Everything is Terrible collection but I can’t rightly recall. But at a previous movie night she showed us a clip of this scene.

Needless to say, we were intrigued. And then she played… Geteven.

It had it all. It was a vanity project, written, directed and starring the same dude, with plenty of martial arts buttkicking in a back tank top (which was the style at the time), a plain-looking protagonist who lands a woman way out of his league, bizarre acting, a song, and most importantly, satanic rituals with human sacrifice. We were drunk and laughing and screaming and it was amazing.

This movie has gotten a bit more exposure since its feature on RLM’s Best of the Worst. Has anybody else seen this movie? Have you done the Shimmy Slide?


I have not at all seen the movie and I doubt I will ever do the Shimmy Slide, but holy carp as a person who loves bad movies, that song is awful!


I’m fairly certain he wrote the song himself.

He’s a man of many… talents?

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I love GetEven. FYI, it was just released on Blu-ray by Vinegar Syndrome under “Champagne and Bullets.” The disc has all three cuts of the film, plus a commentary track by John De Hart. Yes, I own it. No, I’m not proud. Yes, I have forced others to watch it.

EDIT: Had the name on the Blu-ray release wrong.


“My eyes swell open as you do the Shimmy Slide…”


Y’know there’s probably drops or ointment for that, Dude.


I really probably should get a Blu-ray player already. I still get DVDs. They’re so much cheaper now.

I don’t know what I’m gonna do with the hundreds of DVDs I’ve hoarded once the format’s outdated and no longer supported.

Also, “Champagne and Bullets” doesn’t really have the same punch as “Geteven.” Geteven is the much more memorable title.