How many licks *DOES* it take to get to the center of a tennis ball? (Wrong answers only)

All answers will be presented to the Court Case Tribunal for review and a final ruling will be forthcoming within the next 27 fortnites.

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The answer is and shall only be known to those who were there the day the wolf totem fell and K’lor received the divine revelation.

But I reckon it’s 42 licks-ish, based on my deep knowledge and experience of licking things.

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Are we talking human tongue or dog tongue?

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Weeeell, that’s the big question, isn’t it? We can work out it, but it’ll take a bit of research. Before we can work out a budget, let’s see what we need.

I’ll need at least three PhD studentships, a postdoc to do the bits I don’t feel like doing, and we’ll need to perform the experiment in different locations to see whether it’s affected by climate or altitude. Hawaii and Paris, at least. We’ll need test subjects, but they’re easy to catch recruit. Oh, and equipment!

Let me do some numbers and I’ll get back to you.

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None. The tennis ball licks me.

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The conversion rate is 1 human tongue is worth 7 dog tongues. :wink:

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Afifteen, Ahathirtyyyyy, Afahorty – psssshhhhh – 40.

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A quadmillion bajillion kazillion Nathan Fillion.

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Let’s find out.

One… two… three. *CRUNCH* Three.

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I’d ask to see the raw data behind this conversion, but… I don’t think I want to.

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It works out the same as dog years to human years coincidently enough

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I dunno. I never got past the fuzz layer. *ptui*

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…are you all okay? You haven’t even been subjected to Munchie yet!

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This is a part of the grief process. It’s DABDA.

Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
AwmygawdwhyarewewatchingMunchie

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Uh, that’s not how tennis is spelled. o_0 Just sayin’.

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No one is going to say it?

Really?

Really?

Huh.

Ok, I’ll take it.

You lick the balls, I’m bitter!

:slight_smile:

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1,771,561. That’s assuming one lick, multipled with the average per second of 10 every 12 hours over the course of three days.

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Ew. Take a shower.

It’s pronounced in the Blondie style.

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Well…

sigh.

I think… think… you’re reading something in my post other than what was intended.

But, it’s been a long day so I could be misreading your post?

sigh.

Intention -

Read the thread title in Servo’s voice. (Literally heard Crow say, “You lick the balls, I’m bitter!” in my head. Made me smile for the first time all day.)
Scrolled through the thread, saw no one had replied with the obvious Crow reply.
Posted with Crow’s obvious reply.

So…

Sigh.

Happy to edit for better clarity of intent as needed.

Hopping into the car to head to a customer appointment, so may not be able to edit until later today, depending on how bad traffic is. Pretty sure the drive each way will take longer than the time at the customer location.

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