This would have worked…
Bruce Willis saves the life of Marky Mark’s brother.
Short Circuit: Johnny-Five has a short circuit and falls down an open elevator shaft. In a false flag attack, the FBI destroy the surrounding building with improvised explosives.
Stripes: After having been beaten within an inch of his life during a surprise blanket party by his fellow inductees, Bill Murray’s character hangs himself. The remaining recruits become privates second-class on schedule and have rewarding but unremarkable experiences during their service.
The judge realizes Nicolas Cage just protected Monica Potter from being assaulted and lets him go. His daughter has had a bunny since just a year or two after birth.
“Welcome to Jurassic Park!”
“How do you keep the dinosaurs from escaping?”
“We cut off their legs at birth.”
(Montage of various scenes of legless dinosaurs just laying on the ground and moaning.)
(Cut to Alan and Ellie in their room at the Visitor’s Center, laying in bed wide awake, the sounds of moans filling the air.)
“This place isn’t as fun as I thought it’d be.”
“Gandalf, you take the ring!”
Ferris Bueller: “What the hell! I’ll suffer one more period of Ben Stein’s boring voice.”