Mental Health: If you're off your dot yourself...

Oh, they will. They’ll just take longer.

Cats can’t go more than about 3 days without eating meat or their livers shut down. So they have to eat you faster if they have no other source of food. It’s not their fault!

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It’s so great! They’re the cutest buddies and so delighted to have someone chat and dance with them. Big Crow/Servo energy.

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Don’t they (parrots) live a really long time?

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Yes. Like 70+ years.

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Yes! Large parrots can live up to 80 years, and even little budgies and cockatiels have a natural lifespan of 15 or 20.

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A message from the mods (who are also fellow MSTies and community members):

We appreciate the open discussion of mental health and the attempt to further destigmatize this important topic.

However, we would like to offer guidelines to keep this discussion a safe one:

1. Posting personal information. This is a large, public forum. If you are posting information about your personal medical conditions, please realize that many people, even those without an account, may see it. There is always a chance that your post may be viewable or archived outside of the forum by others.

2. Proper medical advice. As well-meaning as most of this forum’s members are, the discussion here cannot take the place of proper medical care. Stated another way, this forum cannot be used to diagnose, prevent, or treat any medical condition or replace professional care. Supportive discussion of supplemental self care is useful, but discouraging proper medical care in favor of alternative treatments is discouraged.

3. Be mindful of others. Please reconsider posting anything that may upset or precipitate a crisis in others. It is often difficult to know in advance what may make others feel uncomfortable, so we ask you to be aware of any feedback others provide about your post’s content. Be willing to edit or clarify your posts as necessary.

4. Be respectful. If any post seems improper, such as harassment of others based on their personal disclosure, please use the flag feature of the forum or otherwise notify the mods or admins. And while humor can help, please “think before you riff” on such a topic.

Thanks for your attention!

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Uh-oh. I posted some personal info above. I sad my bosses were really, really nice. I wouldn’t want that to get around.

(Just kidding, I don’t mind who knows about my mental health issues or anxieties, I would like to help de-stigmatize such things.)

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Ditto, I wouldn’t post anything I feel isn’t warranted, and/or could be used against me.

It is ok not to feel like yourself somedays. Open conversation can be of help to us all, as long as we all post in good faith and understanding.

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Yeah, I’m pretty open and public about what I’m going through and my medical history. Generally speaking, I just deeply believe that if we all communicate honestly and share truthful information, we’ll all be better off.

Obviously, some things are best kept private and you do need to be aware of the risks of sharing. Take the time to reflect and make an informed choice. That’s pretty much always good advice.

Speaking of which, and of destigmatizing:

I’ve had a couple of friends independently tell me the same. That it’s nothing like what’s portrayed on TV and definitely should not have the stigma that it does. Being there can be a healthy break and a good chance for a mental reset. A way to rebuild and start on a fresh track. It’s just good to have a safe space away from all the things that are hurting you, under the care of professionals, with a variety of tools (medical or otherwise) to help you cope better. It’s saved my friends’ lives.

Which is not to say such places are perfect or all that they should be. For one thing, they’re very strict about cutting you off from all outside contact, and that can sometimes be what you need, but it can sometimes be stressful and harmful in and of itself.

That said, the modly reminder is well taken. I think it’s worth talking about this stuff openly, sharing experiences, getting stuff off our chests, offering some support, and helping peel back the harmful stigmas. But we’re not qualified to give advice or professional care.

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I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I give zero Fs about who knows. Granted, if I’m starting a new job, I don’t lead with it. Same when I was dating–I would wait until things were serious to let them know. But other than that, I don’t care.

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I believe wholeheartedly in destigmatizing mental health issues and as a result I share my story with others as necessary.

And believe me, if the federal government doesn’t have an issue with it (since I still have a security clearance), I firmly believe no one else should have an issue with it either. The way I see it, if you think it’s bad to be open about mental health, that’s a you problem; educated and aware people know that it’s just as important as your physical health and should not be stigmatized. That being said, I do hear and will comply with moderator directives. :slightly_smiling_face:

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To further emphasize my point above, I have another small anecdote to illustrate the importance of looking after your own mental health.

I was working at a government agency (I won’t say which one) having been just hired by my company, and at first it was fine; but then I got a new supervisor, and my days became exercises in frustration that left me often choking back tears as I’d leave work for the day. Nothing was good enough for this person; I’d write a product to what I had been told were her specifications only to get the feedback “nope, not good enough; go read other products for better ideas on how to do this”. Nothing specific, no details; just “go look at other products”. It got to the point that if she was out of the office for the day I would breathe a huge sigh of relief because I wouldn’t have to deal with her. I toughed it out for around six months with her, but after my second bout of severe illness (I’m the type who usually only gets mild colds because my immune system is fairly robust) that necessitated me taking time off of work to recover, I realized that I could not maintain things the way they were, because the stress was starting to have an effect on my physical health, not just my mental health. Bearing that in mind, I spoke to my project manager from my company, and because my company is awesome I got a very sympathetic response and a swift move to another project that was a much better fit for me.

I do however firmly believe that if I had NOT had that experience of a nervous breakdown when I was younger that I would have forced myself to keep working at that job until I either quit out of sheer frustration and stress or until the agency in question requested my company to remove me from the project. That’s why I always tell people how important it is to advocate for your mental health, because your mental state can begin to affect your physical state as well. The sheer amount of stress I was under was suppressing my immune system to the point that I first contracted strep throat, then bronchitis, and immediately after leaving that project and starting at my new one I caught the flu; all of which necessitated me taking at least three days off of work to allow my fever to subside so I would no longer be contagious. Prior to that, I don’t think I had needed to take off of work for an illness for over a decade.

It’s a sad state in America (it’s also prevalent in other countries, but not to the extent it is in America) that we’re so conditioned to feel that we can’t take off of work just because we’re stressed out or need a mental health day, when the end result of severe stress leads to physical health issues anyway, for the most part. I haven’t really needed to take one since I left that project mentioned above, but if I feel myself getting stressed out now you can be darn sure that I’m going to take a day off just to re-center myself. We need to advocate for healthier work lifestyles in America, not just conform to the antiquated idea that we have to work 40 hours a week, rain or shine, ill or healthy, and any other way of doing it is wrong. I’m actually glad the pandemic taught a lot of companies that it’s entirely possible to telework and how important it is to maintain their employees’ mental health. The rest of the pandemic sucked, but at least some good has come out of it; employers are not only realizing that they can’t work their employees into the ground, they’re also realizing that in order to attract and keep the right employees they need to offer sufficient benefits to make it worth the employee’s while.

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:clap: :clap: :clap:

I completely agree, and am glad enough others are willing to take the risk that we can muster a quorum for discussion! Check this out, though - earlier this week when I went for my new driver’s license, they were asking me all the routine questions. And wouldn’t you know, right in there with “Do you wear corrective lenses?” and “Do you suffer from seizures or loss of consciousness?” was “Any mental or emotional disturbances?”

I mean… I said no and got on with my life because that was so clearly the correct answer. The clerk at the DMV can’t be expected to engage in a whole nuanced discussion. But, you know… :woman_facepalming:t2:

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I deleted that other post because I wrote it on 2 hours sleep. Let’s try again now that I’m a little more rested. :wink:

For me it’s not that I think it’s bad to talk about mental health, quite the contrary, it’s that I question whether it’s anyone’s darned business but my own, should I share, should I not? That goes for my physical health issues (and it’s been a crapfest in that regard for me this year, but…)

Most of the time I’ve been closed mouthed about it online - and another reason for that was addressed by the mods and others. Now, I talked about this a long time ago, but I was on a forum where we had this odd, bullying, stalker type, who somehow was able to hunt down and find information about us, like, he’d bring things up from other social media sites, even posted some pictures from members Facebook pages, it was creepy, how did he know this, how did he find us? All it took was one little crumb, and one little creep to exploit it.

Ever since, I’ve been trying to be more cautious (though yes, as I deleted earlier, if you find my music, my life is a warts and all open book)

But as someone whose been through the wringer, mentally, etc, you all have my love, support and empathy.

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Being in mental health, as a profession, I understand the privacy issues and also the desire to have others “lend an ear.” Sometimes just putting the words together out loud helps. Sometimes others who sympathize are helpful as well, and makes you feel like you’re not alone. We’ve all been through stuff, diagnoses or not, and maybe that’s just helpful in itself. Obviously we are not professionals, nor can we diagnose anything, but we can be supportive of each other. :purple_heart:

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I’m definitely swinging into depressive mode this week. I’ve been weepy and sad. It doesn’t help that my daughter is having a really hard time since starting middle school a couple of weeks ago and is taking it out on us. Thankfully, medication makes sure I don’t hit rock bottom, but it’s still not great.

Aren’t mental health issues wonderful?

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If memory serves, Squid, you’re still recovering from a medical procedure and not feeling your best. That really wears on your spirit; I’m not surprised your tank is low.

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A medical procedure that failed. That’s the worst part. But a week from Thursday, I get to gripe to them about it.

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Did you know that Amy Schumer’s husband is autistic? Neither of them knew until after they were married and had their son. He’d been misdiagnosed for 39 years. Her show “Life & Beth” is a semi-autobiographical depiction of her meeting her husband Chris. You may find it interesting.

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I’m appreciating The Mod’s for their input/reminders…

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