I thought it was “The Skydivers” but I just saw “The Starfighters” and I was dumbstruck, and struck dumb. It didn’t even have coffee as a plot point, but it partially made up for it with mid air refueling. Other contenders?
Very hard to top Starfighters. Maybe Monster a Go-Go?
Oh yeah, that’s some deep hurting
MSTies or any movie? Because I’m sure some prestigious art house movies (sorry, Le Cinéma or whatever) qualify as the most boring movies ever made. What one reviewer called (I paraphrase), “nothing but medium shots of people staring off into the distance.”
I think the implication from the topic is that we’re only talking about MST3K. And the topic was created in MST3K Central.
I was just thinking about MST movies. If you open the topic up to French film it’s going to be a very long list
Starfighters without question.
Who in heaven’s name would think that having your romantic interest be a corn detassler from Iowa would make her more interesting?
And was there even a plot? I don’t think there was a plot - a couple of subplots, but not a full-fledged plot to be seen.
Learning to fly the new jet with paper cutting wings was the main plot. You can see that the training came in handy because nobody died in the bad weather.
And to promote the wonder of Poopie Suits!
At least it feels like stuff happened in The Starfighters.
The Castle of Fu Manchu, on the other hand, was like a gigantic tumbleweed of boredom.
I wonder if The Starfighters made its budget back just from the minimum number of rubes who shelled out to see BLAZING ADVENTURE on the edge of OUTER SPACE.
Corny girl is on the poster!
Everyone looks so happy to be there. A feature film! My big break!
A quick search shows no other acting credits for Corny Girl. She knew when the jig was up.
Hamlet. I love MST3K, but this is the episode I find the hardest to watch because it’s soooo boring to me.
Hamlet is both boring and disappointing. The Starfighters is merely boring but I can’t say it’s disappointing because there’s no evidence it’s trying to be more than it is. Hamlet can boast Ghosts! Parties! Murder! but it stages and shoots it all through a gauzy murkiness that reminds me of the Werner Herzog movie where he hypnotized the cast so they acted like they were sleepwalking.
“Boring” is a slippery metric for me. As bad as Starfighters and Fu Manchu are – and they are bad – stuff does technically happen. Disjointed, nonsensical stuff, but stuff all the same: dam breaks, ship sinks, jets refuel intimately.
Hamlet would be my choice as well. Stuff happens there too, but I couldn’t tell you what, it’s just impenetrable for me. Not to say it’s a bad episode; I love the riffing. Runners-up for me would be Space Travelers and The Undead.
Hamlet is my wife’s favorite episode, but she’s a real Shakespeare fan. I like Fu Man Chu. Starfighters is like… What the hell is the plot? There’s a lot of talking on phones, and eventually they’re deployed to Europe, and she WILL wait for him… Oh the drama!!!
Starfighters, hands down. While Skydivers is kinda boring, occasionally something almost interesting happens. Hamlet is a bit boring but it is interesting to see some of the actors’ takes on their roles.
Starfighters is just a long, poorly shot, badly acted, pile of nothing. They could have cut it down to 10 minutes and the movie summary would be exactly the same.
Castle of Fu Manchu is the only episode I have ever had to make a special effort to watch during the middle of the day after drinking a ton of caffeine, just to be able to say with certainty that I’d actually seen the entire thing all the way through without falling asleep in the middle.
While it is one of the episodes that’s easiest to fall asleep to, the fact that it jumps so abruptly from an hour and 15 minutes of non-action to the big assault on the castle makes it feel like you nodded off and missed an entire reel change, even if that’s not the case.
Though when all’s said and done… I think it’s impossible to trump Hamlet when it comes to sheer concentrated boredom. I’ve seen so many productions of Hamlet over the years and even high schoolers have more gravitas than those propped up corpses.