MST3K Haiku Thread

Time to get your Japanese poetry slam on, MST3K style!

The haiku format consists of five syllables in the first line, seven syllables in the second line, and five syllables in the third and final line.

A haiku doesn’t have to rhyme, and punctuation/capitalization are entirely up to the writer. Here’s an example of an MST3K-themed haiku:

Troy and Rowsdower
Stealing the old codger’s food
Pondering beer sun

Let’s see what you’ve got!

30 Likes

Flavor of bacon
When you want it in a dip
Pumaman provides

23 Likes

Golden Spider-Duck
Cracking wise while deciding
Who lives and who dies

22 Likes

Fabulous Moolah

She Was Hot In ‘Racket Girls’

I met her one time*

(NOTE: This is in fact true; late in her life she was a truly beloved local celebrity here in Columbia SC, and she was an incredible lady.)

Gamera is here

Friend To Children Everywhere

“Hello!” and “Thank You!”

19 Likes

Looking for Eegah
Oven in the living room
So watch out for snakes

23 Likes

In Pensacola,
it’s douchebags vs. kaiju.
BA-BOOOOOOM! Wrong guys win.

17 Likes

On the SoL
Host and bots in movie hell
Mads insane with glee

21 Likes

The Squat Crimson Pig
Cares not that you don’t get him
He’s the wind, baby

26 Likes

Going to Valley Lodge
Family makes a wrong turn
The Master approves

32 Likes

Commodore-powered
Time transport plane invention
Nick can’t even drive

22 Likes

They’re Bellarians.
Sorry the information
is so scanty, boss.

20 Likes

He’s Caedmon of Ogg
The “can’t” in incantation
Sets his butt on fire

13 Likes

The Law Giver is
Also the Giver of Mints
You can call her Pearl

23 Likes

Pretty iron, bent.
Leather coat, dish of ice cream.
Watch out, fat barkeep!

14 Likes

In honor of Eulabelle:

So many toenails
Not even this many toes
Stupid white people

17 Likes

Hearts filled with despair
Soul and oxygen failing
We’ve got movie sign

17 Likes

Rocky doesn’t like Ken
Tries to kill with a forklift
Oh Rocky. Again?

22 Likes

Save the Southern Star

Thrill as we reach speeds of three

Wasn’t that chick dead?

Doctor Leah Jansen

Presenting like a mandrill

Hula Hoops in spaaaaaaaaaaaaace

11 Likes

BRAVO. I’m so lucky I wasn’t taking a drink.

9 Likes

Next Sunday AD
Joel and Crow and Tom Servo
Riff awful movies

21 Likes