MST3K Season 11+ Songs

Baron and Jonah threw down the gauntlet for singing “Concepts” in the Sing-Along, and it got me thinking… Where can I find all the songs from Seasons 11 and 12 so that I can try?

I see I can buy some of the songs on Amazon, but I would love to be able to purchase mp3s that don’t require a specific player. And the same goes for Season 13.

(Please consider this thread a grassroots petition for more songs to be released! :crossed_fingers:)

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There is a Season 13 soundtrack coming in 2023, which is rumored to be including some of the Farid Barron Trio tracks as well.

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Every Country Has a Monster

Lyrics

JONAH
Reptilicus is silly, but he really illustrates
The great array of monsters all over the place.
Not just in Japan, but across the planet:
An A to Z gamut, a gargantuan panoply.

TOM SERVO
Example, please?

JONAH
Well, name a land!

TOM
Belize.

JONAH
Oh, geez. Easy-peasy, mes amis!
See, in the Yucatan,
You can meet El Cadejo.
In Belize, they believe in him,
They’re not afraid to say so.

TOM
Scotland?

JONAH
Nessie’s livin’ up in a loch!

TOM
How ‘bout Poland?

JONAH
A scary scarecrow named “Bubák.”

CROW T. ROBOT
Huh. So it’s not just Godzilla?

TOM
Well, duh, Crow. There’s a lot that could kill ya.

CROW
Hey!

JONAH
Tom!

TOM
Sorry, Crow.

CROW
Okay.

TOM
Bros?

CROW
Sho’.

TOM
Yo, Jonah, how’s the chorus go?

JONAH
Every country has a monster
They’re afraid of in their nation.

ALL
Every monster has a country.
Yeah, a station they call their home!

CROW
Gunter glieben glauten Crow-ben.

TOM
What turned the musk deer’s guts to spaghetti?

JONAH
Was it in Tibet?

TOM
Yep.

JONAH
I bet he met a yeti.

CROW
Australia?

JONAH
Their drop bears will impale ya.

TOM
Then they’ll sell ya hella touristy paraphernalia.

JONAH
Chupacabra’s chewin’ up cattle down in Mexico.
Déélgééd’s horn is gorin’, battlin’ the Navajo.
Congo’s kongamato is a mondo flyin’ dino.
I know I don’t wanna die, but when I do, he’ll be the guy.

TOM & CROW
Whoa!

TOM
So, Crow?

CROW
Servo?

TOM
Ready to go?

CROW
Start slow.

TOM
Kropermann is a monster from Luxembourg.

CROW
Who’s actually the size of Luxembourg.

TOM
He crushed the whole country of Luxembourg.

ALL
Because he is the size of Luxembourg!

JONAH
What?

CROW
Egypt’s got mummies like Tutankhamun.

TOM
Leprechaun on the lawn in Boston Common.

JONAH
You ‘bots got the hang of it, this song’s really kickin’!

ALL
Chickety-China, the Chinese chicken!

Jonah: And by that, I mean Jiufeng and Peng, giant Chinese birds, and one of them turns into a fish! Anyway…

JONAH
Gnus, killer shrews, and the loup garous
Baba Yaga, Jorōgumo, and the impundulu.
Now you guys realize the surprising size
Of all the worldwide daikaiju!

ALL
Every country has a monster
They’re afraid of in their nation.
Every monster

GYPSY
Sasquatch?

ALL
Has a country.

JONAH
That’s Canada!

ALL
Yeah, a station they call their home!

TOM
Tatzelwurm for the Swiss!

ALL
Every country

CROW
Scandinavia!

ALL
Has a monster

JONAH
That’s kraken!

ALL
They’re afraid of

TOM
Kinga!

ALL
In their nation

JONAH & CROW
Moon 13!

ALL
Every monster has a country.
Yeah, we’ve got Movie Sign!

Credits

  • Lyrics by Storm DiCostanzo & Paul Sabourin
  • Music by Storm DiCostanzo & Paul Sabourin
  • Performed by Jonah Ray, Baron Vaughn and Hampton Yount
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All the songs from S11 were released on a soundtrack album back in 2018. I don’t know through which sites mp3s of the songs are available, but it was released on CD, if that helps.

The songs from S12 so far remain unreleased, I’m afraid. But one day I’d love to see them included on an album. “Get In Your Mech and Drive” is one of my favorites from that season.

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Concepts!

Lyrics

TOM
So the word on the street
Is you got a little movie 'bout time
In particular, the day it’s gonna end
JONAH: Yeah.

TOM
Well, friends, an ordinary movie man
Might make an unassuming
Three-act structure, conflict here
And act break there
Inciting incident, hero’s journey
All of that Syd Field flapadoodle

*CROW:*Flapadoodle?

TOM
But I say, friends, if you wanna
Get the drop on a modern-day audience
Of rubes, you gotta bamboozle 'em
Sweet Jerusalem!
Here’s the news, youse twos
Gonna be a doozy
You can’t lose when ya choose to use
A lot of concepts

JONAH: Concepts?
CROW: Concepts?

TOM
Gotta stock ‘em up
Chock full o’ concepts!
Premises, plot points
Anything and everything
Throw ‘em all at the wall, ya’ll
Just pack in the action
Don’t care if the events
Don’t make no sense, gents!
They’re gonna flip their lids
No kiddin’ when your script’s overridden
And veritably dripping with concepts!

JONAH: Okay, mister, we like the cut of your moxie.
CROW: But can you help us apply this method to our movie?
TOM: Darn tootin’! Everybody throw on a skimmer hat and a one-piece striped bathing suit and let’s dive right in.

TOM
Octagonal solar-powered house
In the desert with a stable in the back?
Not bad for a start! But pals
Let me ask you, hows about a pyramid?

JONAH and CROW: A pyramid!

TOM
A great big green glowing pyramid
It beeps and it boops
And it vanishes a pony
And it gets so small
You can put it in your pocket
Then it shows up later and glows
Nobody knows what it does
Does it matter? Heck, no!
'Cause we’re already moving on

CROW
To a little elf, dancin’ in the bedroom
Naked as a light green jaybird!
Has he got a single thing to do
With the movin’ of the plot?
Who cares?

TOM
And oh, did I mention?
You’re gonna need
A kettle full o’ spaceships

JONAH: Spaceships!
CROW: Yeah!

TOM
Pretty white lights
Two-steppin’ overhead
With a slow-poke alien shop vac
And when you go for a walk
With your wife in the desert
There’s a couple whizzin’ by
Like a Paterson Runabout
Then, when you get home later
Somebody’s turnin’
Bug-zapper lights on and off
In the kitchen!
But I digress.

JONAH
Now we’re only 40 minutes
Into the movie.
So that’s when we hit ‘em
With the ol’ Jack Johnson
With a pretty pair
Of clay-mated monsters
One looks like a Ninja Turtle
Made of lava
With a quintuple-decker mess
Of mammaries
And the other is a big
Mean kitty-cat doggy
Who with no reason bites on
The other one

TOM
Yes, sir-ee, take it from me
You can bet your Robert McKee

CROW
Indeed, we need to succeed
We’ll take heed and follow your lead

JONAH
Your gist consists of this
Pile twist upon twist
And we can’t miss!

TOM
Empty out your drafts folder

KINGA
How 'bout a trinary supernova?

TOM
Yeah, you see? It’s a piece of cake!

MAX
Oh, could they also grill some steak?

TOM
Sure.

ALL
Bring on, and on and on and on
Those concepts!

Credits

  • Lyrics by Storm Dicostanzo and Paul Sabourin
  • Music by Storm DiCostanzo & Paul Sabourin
  • Performed by Felicia Day, Patton Oswalt, Jonah Ray, Baron Vaughn and Hampton Yount
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One of my shower standards!

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#RIPAlexTrebek

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Thanks, Matt! I had trouble tracking down mp3s (Amazon led me in a “buy digital album” “you can’t buy album” circle - argh). But if anyone else is interested, I found the CD reasonably priced on the Shout! Factory site.

As for Season 12… Cue puppy dog eyes!
:pleading_face:

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Mothercrabber

Lyrics

TOM
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
Open to the waist, no-button-shirt-haver
Hoppin’ on my boat and I sail like a regatta
Goin’ through the water like I’m Nereus’s daughter
Swim around the world because I do not mind the moisture
When I find a pearl I’m gonna pull it outta oyster
Slappin’ up Manuel and, no, I never will apologize
Never saw an island that I did not want to colonize
East is east, west is west
And that’s a whole pit of crabs bitin’ on my chest

TOM & EMILY
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
EMILY
Open to the waist, no-button-shirt-haver
I’ll do ‘bout anything as long as it’s illegal
At the casino I drop pearls in my Chevas Regal
If you divvy up my share, man, that’s not right
I’m just tryin’ to get a cock in this cockfight
I’m the kind of guy who dives at the sight of land
Three boats in one boat, that’s a trimaran, man
East is east, west is west
And you can find me wherever another culture is oppressed

EMILY & CROW
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
CROW
Beard, no mustache, loincloth-haver
Threaten me? You must be delirious!
I’m strictly serious, you can call me Nereus
I’m the king, on this island I am lionized
Only guy from this island without giant eyes
Need Syrene to mate, to you it doesn’t seem cool
But I need some dudes to dilute my peoples’ gene pool
East is east, west is west
Stay there…
CROW, EMILY & TOM
Yeah, that’s my main request

CROW, GPC2, EMILY & TOM
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
Super-general-science-background-haver

TOM: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What happened to GPC?
EMILY: Oh, well this is GPC2. I wanted her to be lighter and more maneuverable, so she could hang with us more.
GPC2: You can’t argue with the results! Did you hear those bars I just laid down? Doesn’t change the fact that I’m a…

CROW, GPC2, EMILY & TOM
Mothercrabber, live coral stabber
Puka shell necklace, white-suit-haver
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
Open to the waist, no-button-shirt-haver
I’m a mothercrabber, live coral stabber
Super-general-science-background-haver

EMILY: Oh, look at those pearls…
TOM & CROW: Where my pearls at? Where my pearls at?

KINGA: So what is a mothercrabber anyway? A mom that goes crabbing?
MAX: It’s the song of the summer is what it is!

MAX
I’m a mothercrabber, tires made of rubber
Thing says it’s time to clobber
Fred McMurray starred in “Flubber”
If you don’t want pie, I’ve got some cobbler

KINGA: Just press the button, Max!
MAX: Yeah, we gotta get me in the studio. I’m spittin’ heat.

Credits

  • Lyrics by Ross Bryant
  • Music by Ross Bryant
  • Performed by Kelsey Ann Brady, Yvonne Freese, Emily Marsh, Conor McGiffin, and Patton Oswalt

Transcribed by me, so apologies if they’re not 100% accurate

2 Likes

Carol of the Phones (from the Making Contact live tour show)

Lyrics

GPC2
Hark hear the phones
Ringing their tones
Making you mad
Calls from your dad

GPC2 & EMILY (TOM & CROW sing “making contact” twice over next two verses)
You’re in a chair
Clamp on your hair
Inside a lab
Calls from your dad
Notes on the screen
These guys are mean
Answer the call
Or you will fall

GPC2, EMILY, TOM & CROW
Open the door
Been here before
Inside a dope
Hangs from a rope
Open his eyes
For a surprise
Thought he was dead
Go for the head
You killed a dummy
You want your mummy
Think this is funny
Calls from your dad

Making making making making contact
Making making making making contact

GPC2, EMILY & CROW (TOM sings “making contact” twice over next two verses)
Teacher’s concerned
Her hair is burned
Point of view shot
It’s all we got
Dummy is loose
Like angry goose
What happens next
No one expects

GPC2, EMILY, TOM & CROW
Old creepy house
Look there’s a mouse
This wasn’t bad
Calls from your dad!

Transcribed by me, so apologies if they’re not 100% accurate

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So that dispels any chance that they’ll be included in this seasons soundtrack that has yet to be released.

Here’s hoping we can get them someday!!!

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I am soooo glad this was part of the sing-along! After all of the people raving about it during the live tour, I’m glad the rest of us were able to see it too.

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I’m still thinking about Paul and Storm comparing the request of “make a hit song for our first segment” with being told “write the funniest joke”.

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I didn’t have the chance to go to the Making Contact tour, so to have this featured in a Gizmoplex special was very much appreciated.

I’ve heard so much about the Carol of the Phones from people who have been there, and sure enough, it delivered.

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Amazon sells mp3s, no particular player needed. You are able to download from Amazon after purchase.

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Was the S11 soundtrack available to S11 backers?

Wait, do I already have it in my stash here… somewhere?

S11… hmmm … carry the two… ok, I know which hard drive and which NAS I need to check first…

BRB …

/me disappears into what appears to be a large closet filled with blinking hard drives, CDs. DVDs, Syquest drives/cartridges…

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Yes, because that’s how I have it. I don’t know what the tier breakdown was, but if you have it as a backer, it would be in the Season 11 Kickstarter Edition thingie thing in your Gizmoplex account.

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/me emerges from the closet/corridor, holding a big hammer and grinning like a lunatic

Found them!

I… Had been searching for “Soundtrack”.

The songs are in two S11 KS bonuses, “Songs in the Key of MST”, and “The New Themes of MST3K”.

My bad.

:+1:

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And depending on your backer level, some of us even have it on CD.

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I wasn’t involved in s11-12 backing, so I don’t have any of those goodies. But I did buy a vinyl of the season 11 soundtrack- the blue/grey SOL color variant.

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