New sitcom ideas!

I want to see a show where a private investigator finds that the spirit of his dead wife now inhabits his digital voice assistant. It’s a dramedy wherein she can help him out with her access to all the world’s knowledge, ability to patch into surveillance cameras, etc… all while bickering and flirting and dealing with feelings left unresolved. Guaranteed to get cancelled after 8 episodes on a cliffhanger!

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I can see it now: My Darling, the Echo™. Or maybe The Echo™ of My Darling’s Voice?

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My Siri, Sarah.

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Que Sera, Siri.

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I’m with you; the main foil for the dead wife will be an AI chat bot/ art generator…

In the third episode a petulant, billionaire, man-baby falls in love with the dead wife and pursues our heroes to the ends of the earth…only to find he has actually been catfished by said chatbot; all manipulated by computer wife.

Another arc would be: The husband’s prized Hot Wheel car goes missing; and there’s a hilarious mix up concerning cat litter and the wife’s ashes.

Please, give me more episodic arcs…

gimme more fox GIF by So You Think You Can Dance

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Can we have an episode where the AI is forced to do endless Godzilla pictures?

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Ok- stick with me here- what if we revived My Mother the Car except we make it a sportscar and it’s actually M.O.T.H.E.R., which stands for Motorized Operational Technological Hemi Engine Reactor, a special intelligent engine that our hero, Dave “Supersonic” Crabtree uses to fight crime and win drift and drag races?

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We could do an episode where the AI is having a tiff with her husband and keeps generating AI pictures of him in various funny and embarrassing situations.

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Knight Rider crossover! K.I.T.T. guest stars and becomes a romantic interest for M.O.T.H.E.R. Dave Crabtree is jealous.

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But then Dave sees Michael Knight and also falls in love.

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I’m pitching for a TV tie up of loose ends on all the Cloverfield related movie endings, only this time adding songs. Cloverfield! The Musical.

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How about if M.O.T.H.E.R. is equipped with a long retractable arm at the end of which is a comically large maneuverable hand (in a white glove, naturally) which Dave can use to capture the escaping villain of the week. Dave being the smoldering sexpot that he is, many of those escaping villains happen to be of the female extraction, beautiful yet evil women who long for his kiss as fervently as they long for his demise. In the exciting car chase conclusion to these episodes, just as Dave barrels down the road and pulls M.O.T.H.E.R. alongside the vehicle of his seductive adversary, he can instruct M.O.T.H.E.R. to use the retractable arm to seize the villainess and pluck her out of her car using his catch phrase:

“M.O.T.H.E.R., grab her! M.O.T.H.E.R., grab her!”

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I still kind of wish that one Muppet sitcom attempt would have been closer to a Muppet version of 30 Rock, rather than The Office.

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Police Squad, but without all that funny stuff. As a know-nothing network executive, I don’t get jokes and think any laughter is directed at me. And the colors look too much like reality. Put an ugly filter over it so everyone knows it’s supposed to be depressing and there’s no joy or hope in the world.

Replace Police Squad with literally any idea for the true Hollywood experience.

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It has to be…

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Wait. Roseanne is still on??? ??? ??? ???

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Yes, but Roseanne isn’t on it. It’s called The Connors.

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Yeah I remember when Roseanne got booted. I had NO idea that show was still on. Not sure why I’m surprised, I have no idea what any shows are on. Except CSI. I just assume there’s at least 8 hour a week of CSI on somewhere.

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At this point, just make sure there’s no laugh track. I’ll probably give it at least a two-minute try. My expectations at the grand old age of 56 really ARE that degraded.

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I dreamed the basic premise of Being Human years before the series appeared.

I want royalties!

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