Old Timer Billy Slater

That’s what they put in smoke detectors.

Before he was lassooing children, Old Timer Billy Slater cornered the market on fire safety. He was too big to fail until the great fire of 1902 left him penniless. He had to crawl back up through the ashes to get that one mule the kids were harassing. It was his only possession and without it he would be on the skids again. Those kids were lucky to get off with just having to learn how to organize a public event.

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Finishing his oatmeal.


So… he’s Safety Woman’s Grandpappy?!

Mind… blown.

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Why, in his spare time, Old Billy’s into Boot Blacking!




He likes it VERY MUCH.


Old timer Billy Slater has also become a fully trained and licensed Interociter repairman. Is your Interociter on the fritz? Give old timer Billy Slater a call. Let it ring a while, though. Old timer Billy Slater don’t believe in them mobull phones. They sure as shootin’ give ya brain conniptions, you betcha! No, old timer Billy Slater still uses his good old party line phone, but you see Old Widow Burkland is on that party line too and you know how the womenfolk love to talk and talk and talk. So let it ring a while, okay?