The Mystery Science Discourse 3000 Gallery of Regrettable Foods

Cotton’s so tough on the environment, though. Don’t you have anything hemp-based?

4 Likes

We got this ice cream, man.

cheech chong 80s GIF by RETRO-FIEND

5 Likes

A local dive bar here uses a Pabst Blue Ribbon tap handle on their water tap.

5 Likes

My brother’s homemade “vegan cheese.”

That’s not a good color.

2 Likes

Tiny yoga mat

5 Likes

If that’s not honey flavored, it’s coming right back up.

3 Likes

Since it’s “cheese,” I’m guessing it’s not honey flavored. And since he doesn’t use salt or oil, I’m guessing there’s not much flavor period.

4 Likes

Might make a good soap dish

6 Likes

I just saw a reel detailing the making of cheese made from a potato that looks way more appetizing than this. Plus, it involves spices!

6 Likes

He posted the recipe. It’s got dates in it. Dates.

2 Likes

…what?

3 Likes

That was supposed to look like gouda?

4 Likes

I don’t even know if it’s supposed to look edible.

2 Likes

“'At’sa no gouda!!”

classic film ok GIF by FilmStruck

9 Likes

If you’re gonna go vegan, for god’s sake just go vegan. NO MORE CHEESE FOR YOU. (I am of course directing that at your weird brother, not weird in a good way mind you)

Otherwise you end up making a horrid fleshy kitchen sponge out of nutritional yeast and agar powder.

6 Likes

If it doesn’t look like cheese, act like cheese or taste like cheese… Call it hellifiknow, but don’t call it cheese.

4 Likes

Some vegan cheeses work well as condiments or accompaniments. I’ve had good meat-free “meatball” subs where a dusting of pretend parma worked really well, for instance. It really depends on the dish, I guess…?

4 Likes

It does, I quite like the Morningstar veggie corn dogs for instance.

But if that slab of bandaid-colored foam rubber is what you end up with, better to just admit failure and stick to eating leaves and berries.

4 Likes

This limited time release even earned its own press release!

Kellogg® and Little Debbie® Capture Childhood Nostalgia with NEW Kellogg’s® Little Debbie® Swiss Rolls Cereal - Mar 27, 2023 (kelloggcompany.com)

How about this for a complete breakfast?

5 Likes

Spoon-Size Spiral Sausage™!

The breakfast recommended by 9 out of 10 extremely mercenary heart surgeons!!

(Don’t forget: serve with HEAVY cream only!)

3 Likes