The Smithee Awards

Anyone else ever been to this?

It’s a five hour celebration of just unspeakably awful movies, bad ideas, dumb mistakes, and crazy writing. They host a few events in Michigan, Maryland (I think) and finishing up at Origins Game Fair in Ohio where the final votes are taken and the “winners” are announced.

Much of the MST3K canon has been “honored”… although most lose their categories to much worse films. Every five years they take the previous five “winners” and put them head to head to head to head to head in the MegaMeta Smithees; a few years ago they finally had five MegaMetas under their belt and did the UltraMegaMeta Smithees, recapping 25 years of cinematic… uh… something.

To give you an idea of how stiff the competition is, only four movies from MST3K made it to the UltraMegaMeta Smithees, and only one, Time of the Apes, won its category, ‘Worst Science’ (over The Phantom Planet).

Star Crash was beaten by Collision: Earth in the category ‘Deus Ex Machina’ (for the most implausible save—yes, there really was something more implausible than “Imperial battleship! Halt the flow of time!”), by Night of a Thousand Cats in ‘Whoops!’ (for a mistake that really should have been caught by someone that got left in the film), and by Rana, Queen of the Amazon for ‘Worst Picture’. Bride of the Monster got beaten by The Roller Blade Seven for ‘Crummiest Ending’ (and it really has to be seen to be believed).

If you can get to any of their events, do.


The Roller Blade Seven really sounds like it belongs on MST3K. Unless it’s encumbered with a bunch of gratuitous nudity or violent scenes that would need to be excised. Having Joe Estevez alone qualifies it.

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That movie definitely requires re-using the riff, “Am I tripping?” I haven’t seen the entire movie, just the clips they used at the Smithees, so I don’t know if it has problematic footage elsewhere.

Not just Joe Estevez but Frank Stallone! And Karen Black! And I was sitting here unaware that Roller Blade had ever received a sequel!

Can something be encumbered by its raison d’être? :thinking:

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Oh yes. I should provide a link to the Smithees categories

Just want to add that this year and for the first time, the Smithees will be streaming live on Twitch, Friday 1 October, from 7pm to 12m Eastern.

I shall be there in person – anyone else going to make it?