What will you never, ever watch again?

Edited because I forgot.
Frustrated Season 3 GIF by The Simpsons

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I once heard Patrick Stewart talk about being in LIFEFORCE. He said the only reason he did it was because the script he got was titled “Space Vampire,” and he just wanted to be able to tell people that he was in a movie called “Space Vampire.” So he was disappointed when the title got changed.

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Oh…hmmm…that’s of …screw…er…turning.

Well, it’s kind of a fun tale, at least!

I’ll still watch Daisy Miller again, though. Cybil Shepherd? Yessir! You know…she could have been in one of those Turn-Screw pictures! I must investigate!

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The Space Vampires was the novel it was based on, and a fairly well regarded one.

As a movie, it’s kind of remarkable.

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@moviegique Remarkable how?

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It’s a big-budget sci-fi horror disaster movie that isn’t a horror movie, that isn’t a sci-fi movie, that isn’t a disaster movie—though it has characteristics of all those genres—that features boggling amounts of nudity but in a way that is far less exploitational than aspirational, while at the same time missing most of its aspirations so wide of the mark that it has many of the characteristics of a great bad movie, and yet it’s not exactly that either.

The score is by Henry Mancini, the writer of the script had done both Blue Thunder and The Philadelphia Experiment, and the cast is mostly seasoned vets. Well-lit, well-shot, good SFX right up until they hit the end of the budget. It was Tobe Hooper’s follow-up project after Poltergeist! And yet it was a massive bomb, and deservedly.

The setup is interesting, Mathilda May really is “perfect”, and there’s some (deliberate) scathing insight into the nature of the masculine and feminine, and it all just ends up in the soup.

What was the imagined market for this? It was a hard “R” (and cut to get a rating at all, in the UK) but it was basically The Space Vampires! It’s no date movie, clearly. I think it was Golan who, when interviewed and asked what he’d do with a $25M budget, he said he’d make 25 movies.

And this was their idea of a breakthrough, mainstream hit?

I can’t think of another film quite like it.

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@moviegique FAIR. It is indicative of Golan-Globus output in its larger-than-life tone deafness and mammoth ambitions simultaneously. Cannon viewed the production as their door to bigger business and their unique stamp of personality went everywhere under Hooper’s signature style. Cannon was take it or leave it often in their results and this batted for the grandstands. Tobe had no interference on his wilder urges and Cannon longed to impress as only they could. You’re right. It is a remarkable contradiction and enigma laudable and incomprehensible frequenty at once. Intellectually it is teamining in uniqueness. As narrative? It is painful as Manos (1966) is painful in not seeing what it is outside itself. For the latter, I can’t endure the sensation absent any remote realism whatsoever whereas I nod to the one of a kind vision even if I’m unable to stand it myself. I concur it passes away from rational understanding and that is its power and Achille’s Heel together as one.

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He’s a piece of work. I have a really weird love/hate thing with von Trier that leans heavily toward the “hate” side. His filmography is really hard to swallow.

But he’s crazy talented. Regardless of how I might feel about him as a person (he acts like a child a lot) or the “consumeability” of his body of work (challenging for most audiences; cannot usually bring myself to watch something of his twice), the man has an amazing directorial eye and finds really interesting stories to tell. Even if those stories don’t culminate in a typical American ending where everything gets wrapped up nice with a neat little bow. I actually respect him and his decision to end a story differently.

But man… rough stuff.

I want to like his movies more. I honestly do. There’s something really beautiful and secretly clever in Melancholia but it feels like two stories fused together for convenience and then leaves you feeling either defeated or sadly vindictive.

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First half of Melancholia: Crazy (depressed?) Kirsten Dunst ruins her life and makes everyone around her miserable with her destructive behavior.

Second half of Melancholia: Actually, Kirsten Dunst is right, and it’s a good thing all of existence is going to be wiped out.

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Well now I kinda want to see it

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I’m in the same boat. Pass me the flask.

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I discussed Melancholia in a book I wrote. I too thought the movie was two movies shoved together - the first part a Woody Allen drama, and the second an end-of-the-world film.

I didn’t like it, until I hit upon the idea that the second half of the movie is not really about the end of the world, but how Dunst’s character wanted it to play out in her head. Even Von Trier said that the ending made no sense in any type of reality (the planet slamming into the Earth suddenly reverses course and comes back anyway), so it’s all fantasyland by that point. Thus, to me, everything that happens is how she wants it to happen - the fate of the brother-in-law, the sister who regrets her attitude towards her, the child she never had wanting to always be with her, and - of course - giving her what she wanted: the end of the world.

Once I looked at the film in those terms - which admittedly are not how Von Trier wanted us to look at it - the movie worked fairly well for me as the disintegration of a human mind, and in a way, the end of the world. At least for her.

As for Von Trier, any misstep is forgiven for giving us THE KINGDOM (although he really should have tried harder to get it finished while the cast was still alive).

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Disney’s 2007 “Bridge to Terabithia.” Sadly, I didn’t know the story (book). I watched it on DVD when it was originally released. Was just expecting a nice, chill, kids’ book movie… and then THAT happened to Leslie (had to look her name up because it’s been awhile). Ruined my whole night. To this day, can’t even imagine watching it again when browsing the movie shelf.

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I’ll dip into the discussion with Dancer in the Dark, Bjork is beautiful, the story is beautiful, and haunting, I have the DVD. I AM NEVER WATCHING IT AGAIN. I also heard that Lars is just a piece of work, and is the reason that Bjork never wanted to be in another movie again (until apparently now in that viking movie coming out?)

Also I want to mention a subcategory of media I couldn’t finish, which mainly consist of Magnolia (even though I adore Aimee Mann) and House of Leaves (though I adore Poe). I also aaaalmost ejected from Midsommar after 10 minutes but stuck it out.

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I wouldn’t recommend LvT to hardly anyone but it is a very well made movie. It’s not exactly entertainment but it’s…something. IIRC, a line is: “Life is a mistake. Life is only on Earth. And not for long.”

So. Yeah.

That’s interesting. I saw it as the director’s externalization of his own narcissistic depression in a way meant to validate it. Sorta.

I try not to get too precious with my interpretations, but, man, some movies really demand that.

I’m not familiar with his other works except…Antichrist?

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I had reservations similar to those mentioned, but I have to admit that when I saw Mathilda May, I was astonished as I rarely have been when watching a movie. Good LORD.

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Really, not even uncredited? That’s a shock. It’s along his alley. Most of what was shown on Epix Drive-in was his work. That’s where I watched it. Well it’s on my list of things to not watch with your parents. That’s a very strange list considering my family.

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Not a smidgen. Troma was NY/NJ-based.

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On my last half hour or so of the Rifftrax version and never again will I watch this garbage. Nice to see Puma Man’s side kick and all but needlessly killing 3 sharks for real that were minding their own business made me google it and from everything I can find apparently yeah they legit harpooned a bunch of sharks for the movie. Also there’s a scene where a girl is attacked by birds and the doll bites out their throats but in reality apparently they just slit the throats of a dozen or so real birds.

The movie was awful in an almost enjoyable way up until these revlations and I may be mad but not at innocent animals so I vow to never watch this crapfest of a film again.

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Even if you ignore the animal cruelty, it’s well-nigh unwatchable. Convoluted, padded, and completely uninteresting.

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