Is this… Full? Because my office’s parking lot is pretty anemic on any given day (and I love it because that means a quieter office when I’m not teleworking).
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Nope. That be “empty.” except for a few managers and fools like me who roll out flex dispatch sometimes until the sun goes down. Not many people at all.
This particular parking lot is jammed full until about 0610. As are the others at our Delivery Station. The magic happens at night.
I’m not much of a photographer, but I should have taken a quick picture of the inbound yard…dozens of tractor-trailer-cab rigs, none of which are driven by my company excluding evacuating the post of in-yard hostler (drive/park empty cabs, pretty much).
Actually dozens of empty trailers just sitting there.
But we can’t do anything with them. We do XL “box trucks” dispatch, but we don’t touch the cabs unless needed to re-park them…that’s the whole thing. Yes, even the trailers one might see painted bright blue in AMZN livery on the highway. Even CDL people who work for AMZN don’t drive those except maybe a few hundred yards down the street if the yard gets full.
Not going to happen.
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It happened around the same time but amazingly it was delivered by an Amazon driver 
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So our tyrant of a postmaster is opening our post office for the next couple weeks at least and already she’s spazzing out with brain dead tasks like wanting me to hose out the inside of a loaner mail van because it has ants in it…
She literally wanted me to spray water inside a newer mail van with electronics because it has ants inside the subframe of the vehicle!
Obviously I wasn’t going to do that and we don’t have any bug spray so all I had on hand was hand sanitizer that smells like tequila that I sprayed all over the inside so I told the carrier if you get pulled over and the officer smells alcohol jus say "I’m not drunk osifer"
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Paving equipment just started showing up this morning at our post office apparently to repave the entire rural side parking lot …
This work order was placed 2.5 years ago and they are just now starting on it!
Had to get all the carriers to move their mail and personal vehicles asap so these guys could prep today and pave tomorrow.
And of course they’re all griping and complaining about it 
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Oh, I guess sometime the week before last one of my friends at work got called a “fat bi&Sb” by one of the DSP managers. Obviously, nothing came of it, because AMZN specializes in elephant dong milking and treating these delivery companies as though they’re royalty.
But despite her shocking, very adult sense of humor, I know she’s a bit apprehensive inside, although she’d like to learn the exit yard marshall role (the one where you get to yell out random funny stuff over a megaphone). She is nervous about making a mistake, though, which she told me in private, although you’d never guess it.
I did send her a semi-public happygram on this FB private group I started for people on my team (yes, it’s mostly me posting long gossippy posts about various things at work), and I think she appreciated being semi-publicly acknowledged as being one of the bright spots of my day.
Of course, she’s widely beloved and is close with our managers and the “cool” people on our team. And she knows we all love her, but she does put on a brave face that not too many people can observe or hear about directly.
But now I have some revenge to execute upon the insulter. Already begun, but it will be subtle, and last for an eternity. Nobody can speak to my people like that.
I like projects! What can I say? I’m a team player!
Oh, and PonyBoy, another DSP manager for a different company…he knows what he did. He gets the thousand yard stare while I’m walking directly at him. But that’s for personal reasons: he’s just a dillweed, and I don’t like him. And his company sucks.
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So the postmaster relays to my coworker that she wants the entire yard cut weedeated and blown today.
So for the last 2 hours I cut the entire yard and my coworker used the blower to clean off the sidewalks. The weedeater wouldn’t crank so I’m not going to bother with it.
And the gas can is missing but had just enough gas to finish the yard so the mower was running on fumes when I finished.
Next week they’re calling for rain and the following weekend I’ll be on vacation so I’m not going to worry about it 
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Isn’t that a job for a lawn care crew?
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It should be but the senior redneck custodian took it upon himself to do the yard work but he’s been out for over a month now so it falls to me.
I don’t like doing yard work here because of the steep hills along the busy streets so I wait until she says something.
I would love to pass this on to a landscaper!
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Oh, I forgot this one, but every calendar day at my Delivery Station has a special “theme,” like tropical shirt day! Dress like a superhero day! Dumb s*&^ like that.
I just noticed as I was leaving yesterday, helping Senior Speedy water the plants with discarded but mostly full recyclable empty water bottles, that yesterday was “Celebrate Bisexuality Day!”
Which is great, and power to. But how am I supposed to “celebrate” that, exactly?
Sometimes work is like a Steven Wright joke gone wrong!
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My buddy at work decided to hint with a photo that I should call in Sunday night thanks to all of these ‘closures’ we’ll have to deal with in addition to our 10+ trailers! YAY LOGISTICS
(I won’t call in though, I love the chaos and the workout I get
)
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Looks familiar. Shut 'er down! Hazmat! Everybody work up to no more than sixteen, and be prepared to talk to HR!
Load-out: scuff your shoes! Induct: be ready!
&c.
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Oh, there are a few I forgot about.
One good one was yesterday, after helping Speedy make his “rounds” and clean up some recyclables he stashed around the building to “help” water the “plants” (off the clock)…never mind…
Anyway, so they did a few waves of flex dispatch, but Ivan and Russell were there and they don’t need any extra help for just like a dozen routes. I say to Ivan as I’m crossing the drivelane, “Yo, I’ma *&&S you up, cross the drivelane yo!” He: “It’s all right, go ahead!” Me: “I know! I’m doing it!”
So who is in lane one, spot one? Let’s say her name is Bianca and she is from Venezuela, which I think is true because why? Let’s just say, one knows certain things about our drivers. She usually wears a white tennis skirt, very short. Today it was a maroon color. But a tennis skirt, in the same style.
Yes, while I was waiting on Speedy, I’m somewhat ashamed I admired her figure very openly while leaning on the car. She was not shy about bending over.
I shouldn’t say any more. A man in a high-vis vest ogles an attractive woman. News at eleven!
Two: never mind, I just got distracted. More later, maybe.
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So the resurfacing project is done and the workers left the gate opened over the weekend… it looks like they forced it open and got the chain link and barded wire tangled up and couldn’t close it so they parked a mail truck to block the opening. Guess who was tasked with getting the gate untangled… Yup this guy 
after about an hour of cutting up tangled chain link I got the gate closed and padlocked.
Then I was tasked with making a schematic of the parking lot so when they repaint the lines they can paint rural route numbers in the designated parking spots. But the numbers are all out of order:
2,3,5,6,7,14,10,15,18,43,20,22,31,38,34,36,40,23,37,27,29,41.
Some think they should be in numerical order while others are adamant about keeping their spot where it is. The postmaster doesn’t seem to care how they’re numbered so I guess they will stay out of order 
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So again Wednesdays are my day off and my coworker calls me at home saying the guys were there to paint the parking lot and stencil the route numbers.
They were numbered on paper as stated above but someone crossed them out and put them in order anyway! So know the carriers are going to be all pissed off at me thinking this was my fault when somebody in management (probably the miserable postmaster because she loves to create unnecessary chaos since she’s a miserable PoS) did this…
What was the point of me asking the carriers where their parking spots were originally if they were just going to override my schematic and put them in order anyway?!
If the paving crew had showed up Tuesday like they said they would, they’d probably have been stenciled in the original order listed…
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You know? I think there might be some issues of leadership where you work. Just rough inference.
What’s up with the carriers obsessed with their original spots? Maybe it’s tradition, or distance from their work vehicles, or perhaps gross/flats/letters go out in staggered waves, which latter would make very good sense.
All I know is on Oct. 2nd I’m getting a $1.05/hour raise, which is good. And my feet hurt. Which is bad.
And since my driver’s license status is “Valid, With Hardship Permit,” I can commute to work tomorrow, not wait around an hour after work for Senior Speedy to do whatever he does, and leave my house at a time of my choosing. No, the USPS hasn’t delivered the official hardship letter, but I have my license, and it should be on file, so, stuff it, I’m commuting tomorrow to and from work.
And, I can stay as late as I please and pick up a sixth day each week for the overtime. I also don’t tailgate or make aggressive, bone-headed merges, nor do I fail to anticipate an errant cyclist on blind curves on a two-way suburban street through the hills.
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DING-DING-DING-DING
WE HAVE A WINNER!! 
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All of the above pretty much.
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As expected the adult children were whining and crying 
I just told them talk to the idiot postmaster! This wasn’t my fault!
Some woman came in earlier apparently to conduct an inspection of our building which includes designated areas for certain parcels like aviation and hazmat.
This is clerk stuff yet the postmaster tells my coworker to look into why we don’t have these designated areas marked? Why don’t you ask the mail clerks?? Since this place has been rearranged these areas were never used so the postmaster did away with them but wouldn’t admit that this was her doing so now we have to resetup these areas again. This is a clerk responsibility not maintenance! I told my coworker to stop messing with stuff that doesn’t pertain to us because she’s going to keep adding onto our work load!
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