Well one thing’s for sure, gentlemen, the U.S. of A. still makes the best Betas on the market, and I mean nobody is gonna change that!
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I’VE GOT IT!
It’s fresh!
It’s sassy!
It’s free!
It’s me!
Beta’s an exciting new fragrance from Prince Matchabelli!
[laughs feebly]
maybe not
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No, I know, I think Beta is a high-energy prop comic. You know, like, Ladies and Gentlemen, the Funnybone is proud to present funny man Beta?
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Okay, it’s beta But is it bold?
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Maybe the real meaning of Beta is the friends we made along the way.
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BOLD?!
Well, hell yes, it’s bold!
It’s Cowboy Mike’s own original red-hot RICOCHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET Betacue Sauce!
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I just came for the obligatory “you mom” joke.
Your mom’s Beta!!! 
I’ll see myself out…
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Beta can swallow a whole canteloupe. Beta is available for parties.
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I don’t think you appreciate the gut reaction people have to these things…
… it’s all psychological. You yell ‘Beta,’ everybody says ‘Huh? What?’ You yell ‘Shark’… we’ve got a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.
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I hope when the Beta version is wrapped up they roll out the Beat version because I am ready, Daddy-o!
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It’s Spirit Halloween, they’re probably sold under an off-brand title like “Social Nonconformist” or something.
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They can’t afford the Beatnik license.
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What a sell-out, man. Those duds are squaresville. You’ve got to feel the real deal, you know what I mean, Gene?
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I’m just hoping for a DVD or at least a VHS release. It’s hard to find Beta players these days.
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I always try to dress as a beatnik, but I just end up stereotypically French.
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