Were you to need tutelege in the mystic arts by a magic user but it MUST be one from MST3k, be it film or sketch, who would you choose as your mentor AND WHY?!
Estelle Winwood. No contest. Experience will win out.
I’d lose my head over Livia (literally and figuratively) and Melissa knows where the fish live. But I’d go with our water witch, Jessica (The Thing That Couldn’t Die) because she can be sweet in one moment, and then snap, and wish you dead in the next. I find that endearing.
Also, if we were ever lost in the desert, she could find us a drink.
Plus, she has her own theme song. So, that’s the mentor for me.
I have a feeling that Doctor Mordrid could very well change the MST3K sorcery scene…
If we’re talking magic practitioners in general?
Heck, I’ll go Santa Claus from Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. He has some rather practical tricks and probably wouldn’t attempt to do something ironically malevolent.
Markov is a wizard of sorts. He could fulfill my dream and teach me how to have an intense and inappropriate relationship with a chimpanzee.
Troxartas? Doesn’t he use pull-start magic and block his own speech? What else are we asking for here?
This is such a great question. I’m going to go with Baba Yaga.
I read that according to Slavic folklore it’s even odds that she’ll help you out instead of eating you. I think my odds might improve if I don’t stomp up and ruin her nap by messing around with her house and then insulting her and making demands.
Like, Ivan, my dude. Maybe bring her some hot dish, ask how her cat’s doing, say please and thank you. Basic hero meeting a powerful sorceress stuff.
David Shelby. He’s a wizard with the ladies.
And she could really…uh…frame a pendant.
And it’s as unobtrusive as the dollar sign Perico wore in the recent Santo movie.
Oh, and I forgot to mention, under her tutelage I would learn how to identify and point out evil.
I know he’s not terribly powerful, but I’d still enjoy studying under Nissius. I think I’d enjoy going from village to village advising farmers what to plant to ensure a good mix of crops across the land. I also have a lot of respect for a man who accepts in his possibly final moments that “the goats will be happy, whether I visit them or not”.
I like my wizards to be practical and rugged but still with a certain style.
You know what? I’m going to go ahead and count Crabby The Crab Hat as a wizard.
This leads me to think of a different kind of sorcery.
A wizard and a demon from the depths of Hell are two very different things, my friend.
I see Mister B Natural as more of a capricious fae creature.