"Why don't you make me up a sign saying See the Amazing Colossal Man?" MST3K title drops

I mean…cheesiest moment of the entire trilogy?:

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“You shall be the Fellowship of the Ring. I, Elrond, have already trademarked it because I, Elrond, am no fool. Now, your foes are Sauron, who lurks in the Dark Tower of Barad-dur, and Saruman, who dwells in the tower of Orthanc.”

“Wow… Two Towers?”

“Yes! And when they have toppled shall the Return of the King be brought to be.”

“With the help of the Amazons!”

“What? There are no Amazons in Middle-earth.”

“Sorry, just pandering to our new bosses.”

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Mitchell!

Prince of Space!

If they could pronounce words, Werewolf would have made the cut

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Gamera!

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I guess the best one for me is I Accuse My Parents. I literally had no idea where that tense opening courtroom scene was going until our young lead dropped that bombshell on us!

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I was sure he was going to accuse someone else’s parents.

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Or at least make little “air quotes” around the “word” “parents”. That would have sent the movie in a whole new direction.

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And as far as I’m concerned, his accusation is baseless. At best, his neglectful and inattentive father is to blame, as his mother does put forth an effort and appears to show concern, but dad would have been better off not there at all. But even that said, it’s Jimmy’s dishonesty and stupidity that are to blame. But as Joel said when he was all but let go: “Thank God I’m White!” (now imagine THAT being the title of this film!)

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He really should have stuck with selling shoes.

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I mean, while not amazing (assuming the “after taxes” joke wasn’t real), $25 a week translates to about $400 a week now. So depending on where he was living, that might be a nice if not supurb life on his own…

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Well, the median rent for 1940 was $27/month, and a young man could be expected to rough it for probably half that, which would give our Jimmy close to $70-80/mo to play with, assuming he had no side hustles, commissions, or essay contest winnings, and could score the occasional hamburger sandwich with all the trimmings from a softy diner owner.

This guy could afford a new car within a year, but if he drives a beater and plays it lean, he can get in on the ground floor of some of these new fancy suburban tract home projects that Our Boys are going to need when they come home from the war. Big money, there, fella!

Say, why isn’t Jimmy signing up to help the war effort? :eyes:

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Well, he seemed to be still in school at the time, though that plot thread seemed to be dropped after his mom came to the meeting drunk. I dunno, summer break or just graduated maybe for why he could get a day job.

That and who knows if he could have passed the physical. His older friend Steve had to go through a genetic change to get in… :wink:

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We hope Jimmy buys his next 10 cars from us.

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What we are not told is the court subsequently agreed to allow Jimmy to enlist in the Army. He was killed by a sniper at Hacksaw Ridge during the Battle of Okinawa.

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It’s definitely odd why a man of draft age wasn’t in basic training after leaving school in 1944.

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“TEN CARS?!” :rofl:

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“He certainly was a citizen. Citizen Kane.”

“Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn. And now, I am gone. Gone With the Wind.”

“Luke, the Clone Wars were not my only wars. I have been in many Star Wars.”

“Nazis? I hate those guys. And they aren’t just Nazis. They are Raiders of the Lost Ark.”

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He’s no Ronald Gilroy, that’s for sure.

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Life is sweet when you’re 4F.

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But remember Jimmy was used to scoring $5 for just being in the same room as his dad. He got hooked on the soft life.

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