So, many of the films featured on MST3K aren’t very good. So, sometimes to jazz it up, the filmmakers add songs to the soundtrack, hoping for that hit single. Maybe they’ll even go for a full on musical number, with dancing and the works. However, since the movies aren’t good, it goes without saying that many of the songs aren’t good either. So, what do you think is the worst?
My nomination- “And The Lord Said Laugh” (also known as “The Mushroom Song”) because it just seems to go on and on and ON. It’s like an acoustic Master Of Puppets (and do NOT get me started on Master Of Puppets, we’ll be here all night!).
“I just wanna know if the Lord said it this many times in a row?”
“That’s why the Deuteronomy is so long.”
I second your nomination. In fact, although I love that episode, I have started fast-forwarding through that song when it starts. IT’S SO LONG
“We don’t care if it all makes sense, the name of the song is Prune.”
You’d think a guy who showed up in a bunch of Kay Kyser movies would have a better sense of rhythm.
Hands down, the winner is “Eenie Meenie Miney Mo” from Teenage Werewolf. They were too lazy to even think up lyrics. The singer doesn’t even try to stay on the beat. Even the “Cotton Picker” singer from Untamed Youth tried to stay on the beat. Oh, and the attempt at Calypso from UY is the runner up. Van Doren seems like a swell person but she’s barely a singer at all, and certainly not a Calypso singer.
I feel like you could look at the entirety of The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies and say, “Geez, take your pick…”
Yeah. That’s bad.
Even “Sing whenever I sing whenever I sing” sounds like a Glyn Johns/Tom Dowd production compared to that crap.
As does “California Lady” by Fishlips and the Squatting Grunts.
That movie had the WORST songs I’ve ever HEARD. Ugh I wanted to bang my head against the wall when I first watched it
I wonder how much of that was just indifferent translation. Or maybe they didn’t even bother to try translating, and just wrote a bunch of new and random stuff knowing we lazy monolingual types deserved no better.
But yeah, that’s a trainwreck of a song. As if someone set out to write a Marx Brothers singing bit, but without any comedy.
That movie is a leisurely but determined stream of absolute WTF-ery, and that’s why it slowly crept up in my estimation to become probably my second or third favorite of the Netflix era.
I consider myself VERY forgiving of the songs on this show. Many of them sound more amateurish but have a sort of weird charm to them. I can sit down and listen to California Lady or Night Train to Mundo Fine. But the problem with this song is it is a musical number and in theory that could carry forward the story or at least be fun but even the lyrics in the song indicate this movie doesn’t give a poo, making up rhymes for no reason that are not clever or interesting or tie into anything. I really, really hate this number.
but she’s barely a singer at all
I’m not sure she was hired for her singing ability.
If the filmmakers only had a real budget they could’ve dubbed in Marni Nixon. : /
Icing on the garbage cake, it just goes on and on… so many verses.
I’ve never had prune cake, but prune danish is tasty.
JOEY, THE LEMUR, JOEY, THE-
Oh, in an experiment. I’m casting my vote for “Yipes Stripes” from “Teen-Age Strangler”.
It’s infected my brain so much that, if I’m feeling extra obnoxious, I’ll go around proclaiming “the name of this [object] is Prune!”
The infinite-loop chicken dance in Colossus and the Headhunters. I expect liturgical dance (it brings in the parishioners!) but this one was just interminable. And I even get that it was supposed to be, but I still got the feeling we were supposed to be enjoying it… and I didn’t.
I love that scene, not because it’s good but because it’s an absolute turkey shoot (as a fan once described Puma Man on IMDB). It’s like they put it out there expressly to be riffed on.
Did they really think that was good dancing? That’s my question.
The neverending guitar solo in The Dead Talk Back qualifies here. Apparently the producers asked the guitarist (Andy LaCasse) to make it as cheesy and grating as possible. Mission accomplished!