Riffers Anonymous

Do you watch Mystery Science Theater, Rifftrax, or other riffing media more than once a week? Do people around you complain that you talk too much during movies? Do you have trouble watching movies, shows, stage productions or even TV commercials without making smart comments? Do you find yourself using quotable riffs as jokes in real life conversation, even with people who don’t know what you’re referencing? Then YOU might have a riffing addiction

Riffing addiction can affect the lives of those who suffer from it and those who love them. This ailment is not something to be ashamed of, but something to seek help and support for. Welcome to Riffers Anonymous, an online community of fellow sufferers here to help each other manage our riffing addictions. Please use this thread as a place to speak about your struggles, share resources, and share your victories, both great and small.

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My name is wyswysia and I’m a riffer. It started back in high school and I just can’t quit it. I liberally pepper my everyday conversation with riffs, going down (down, down) rabbit holes to find questionable riffing connections, just to make a riff. Like I did here. The struggle is real (to find the right riff), but I’m up to the challenge.

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Thank you, wyswysia, for your open honesty about your experience with riffing. We are all here for you

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I FEEL SEEN

Er I mean, not me, sitting around in my MST3K backer shirt and my MST3K live tour hoodie, drinking out of my MST3K mug while watching my MST3K collection and quietly humming The Canada Song. Doesn’t sound like me AT ALL

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Pearls, we hear you, we understand where you’re coming from, many of us have been there. I used to feel the same way as you. But denial is a component of addiction, and the first step toward recovery…is admitting you have a problem :pray:t2:

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I’ll admit my problem is that I don’t have an encyclopedic knowledge of all the riffs from all the movies. And for that I am ashamed. :disappointed:

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My name is ArtCrow and I am a riffer. I have been doing riffs since the 1990s and I can’t stop.

But, it feels so good that I don’t want to stop.

I need riffing in my life!

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To hell with you people. I riff and I’m glad and I can stop any time I want to!

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:sob: OH GOD IT’S ALL TRUE

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I asked my wife if I had a problem, and I think we can power the whole Eastern seaboard with the :roll_eyes:

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I riff only twice a week…

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tell us how space went

cue Shatner voice: Space? The. Final. Frontier?

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We’re proud of you. But remember, even what seems harmless still puts you at risk. It’s important to get your riffing addiction under control before it gets out of hand.

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Sorry, I have no intention of ever doing this. Am I in the wrong thread?

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I’m only here because it is a condition of my reprobation, I’m not a Riffahaulick.

[quote=“Rifftilicus, post:1, topic:26498”]
Do you watch Mystery Science Theater, Rifftrax, or other riffing media more than once a week? [/quote]

Once a week, that’s for lightweights. Get back to me when you have binged an entire season in two days (not counting seasons 7 or 12), but that just makes me cool, not addicted.

Yeah? So, that movie deserved it, and I’d do it again!

Duh? I do that with everything. I’m riffing this thread right now… That doesn’t prove a thing…

Oh, they know… They know, I tell ya!
I’m not a, a, a… Riffa…
sobs
Oh no, I am a Riffahaulick… Now what do I do?

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Here at Riffers Anon our goal is to help program participants get their riffing addiction under control, instead of letting their addiction control them. You’ve made it past Step One, Admitting You Have a Problem. Congratulations! This allows room for Steps Two and Three: Examining Past Errors and Admitting to Our Mistakes.

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Well, gee, I really wanna, but that sounds like a lot of work.

Oh, look, The Beast of Yucca Flats is on, gotta run.

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I bought the whole magnificent BBC production of The Hollow Crown - Shakespeare’s whole War of the Roses oeuvre, starring every great Shakespearean actor currently alive - so I could open a bottle of wine and absolutely light it up once a year or so.

And am I sorry? I am sorry not!
For riffing in this life is all we got.

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Sometimes I do it three times…

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