1011. Horrors of Spider Island (1960)

[CLANG_Potroast]

Think of what it would’ve added if just ONE of them kept losing stuff in her oversized purse. Or if one of them carried a forked stick and whined, “I hope a tree falls on you!” So many great cinematic possibilities just… scuttled.

Related:

Experiment Mix & Match

Please somebody splice together Santo In The Treasure of Dracula with Horrors of Spider Island. But make the time-traveler lingerie model the action quasi-hero, instead of “Gary.” I mean, she has more personality than he does. Not to mention more than any of the dancing ladies. Though that’s not saying much. Also, if Santo were the scientist stuck on the island, I’m pretty sure he’d manage to not get killed before the film even started rolling. Just sayin’.