Barney, in the Key of Spike Jonze

Now that Greta Gerwig’s Barbie is setting the box office on fire and making alpha males cry, Mattel has been toying with other potential blockbusters based on their deep pool of properties. One of them just happens to be a certain purple dinosaur attempting a comeback and the bigwigs already know what’s in store for him. No egg hunt nonsense. This time, it’s gonna be “surrealistic” and “A24-type” with Daniel Kaluuya along for the trip.

And it won’t be for kids. :scream_cat: Now that’s an idea!

One can only imagine how this concoction will turn out but Exec. Kevin McKeon had this to say about the premise:

We’re leaning into the Millennial angst of the property rather than fine-tuning this for kids. It’s really a play for adults. Not that it’s R-rated, but it’ll focus on some of the trials and tribulations of being 30-something, growing up with Barney—just the level of disenchantment within the generation. It would be so daring of us, and really underscore that we’re here to make art.

And here’s producer Robbie Brenner’s pitch:

I don’t know that it’s necessarily going to be darker. It’s just going to be unique — more of like a ‘Being John Malkovich’ or an ‘Adaptation.’ Any movie that has Barney is not certainly going to be straightforward. We’re not making ‘Ted.’ You know what I mean? [It’s about] identity and finding who you love and who feels alienated[;] what does it all mean? [It’ll] be more adult and have adult themes — and sort of be a little bit off-kilter.

This does have the potential to be a really interesting movie, all right. It did at least piqued my interest. Wouldn’t you all agree?

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I saw Death to Smoochy in a theater and a lot of people brought their small children. There was crying. I hope they can avoid that with a proper Barney movie.

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I’m sorry, what.

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I was going to say, this movie has already been made and people didn’t get it that time (unfortunately).

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When I saw Pan’s Labyrinth there was a family with a kid about six years old there. PSA folks: just because the movies stars a child doesn’t make it a children’s movie.

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A Pan’s Labryinth aside…

So there’s a scene where they’ve got a woman locked in a barn, and the captain (I think? Anyway, lead officer bad guy) is going to interrogate her, and one of his subordinates asks if he wants other soldiers there, and he says “no, it’s only a woman.”

When I heard that in the theater, I thought “haha, oh wow she is going to whip his hinder real good” and I cheered.

But later I realized nobody else heard my thought process so they probably (and not unreasonably) heard what they believed was some super misogynist guy shout out “yeah!” at the idea of a woman being helpless.

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At risk of slightly going off-topic since the heading is about Barney (shudder), I was walking out of Oppenheimer and heard one of the aforementioned alpha males QQing about what a horrible movie Barbie was. My wife and I discussed on the way back to the car about how “sad”** it was that his bubble was punctured and he had a glimpse into his privilege.

Sorry if this post is contentious but when the privileged are “crying” when forced to confront the uncomfortable reality they’ve been living in, it makes both me and my wife a bit** unsympathetic.

I haven’t seen the movie yet, but I am really looking forward to it. Not a Barbie fan, but a fan of the conversation it will hopefully start about equality in hopes it will open some minds.

** heavy sarcasm

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I’m told it’s got a lot of social commentary about the nature of Barbie, so even people who aren’t Barbie fans will enjoy that element.

MOD HAT: Hey gang, let’s all remember this is a thread about a giant purple dinosaur in a forum for a cow-town puppet show. :slight_smile: There are plenty of places out in the big internets to discuss the political aspects of a movie fronted by a doll.

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I know one!!

Wild West Lol GIF by Justin Gammon

Man I love the way you worded that in just the most absurd manner possible.

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Now let’s round up the wiener dog and get back on 'em topic.

What tickled me is that when some people heard “A24-type,” they automatically went “Ohse nose! They’re turning Barney into a horror movie!” Not sure how they came to that conclusion since an association like that is more specific than on the surface.

Besides, a horror movie concept’s my idea! :smirk: