This statement is true on many levels. Not sure if it counts as a roller skating movie, or even as a movie, or as anything created by humans. It may not even exist, and we’ve all somehow collectively hallucinated it.
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LOL my friend.
If anyone reading this isn’t familiar with the abomination that is Rollergator, the RT description does an excellent job of delicately summarizing some of its, um…shortcomings.
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Yes, I know I’m replying to a 3 month old post, but I just saw “Sting of Death” last night and… my gosh. As soon as I saw the plastic bag / wetsuit “monster” it hit me I’d seen this movie described on this forum.
I’m not sure if we’re supposed to clearly see the outline of the actor’s head or not, but we do. (“Actor” loosely defined).
When we first meet Egon the assistant, the first thing I said was “This guy is Torgo, Ortega, and Mickey all rolled into one!”
And you’re spot on about how out of place that shower scene is compared to the squeaky clean rest of the movie. The movie itself made the issue obvious when one of the female characters decides to swim, is told where to change, and then says no, she actually prefers to swim in her very nice and delicate blouse. But then, taking it a step more nonsensical, one of the guys around the pool tells her NOT to get in the pool, because, uh, she’s too overheated from her dancing? Which, stating the obvious, (1) that’s the purpose of a pool, and (2) in real life I doubt any teenage boy tells any girl in a white blouse “no don’t get wet!”
This movie is so ripe.
Edit: Keep in mind in this pool scene that not a single one of the 10 or 20 partiers notices the man in a wetsuit and plastic pag swimming around this standard sized back yard pool until the attack.
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I want to go to there.
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What. The Living. CRAP. Is THIS??
How is it possible that I’ve never heard of a Pia Zadora Science Fiction New Wave Rock Musical from 1984?! Until NOW?!
Thank you DoubleLoop. Thank you so bloody much!
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Fun fact: Pia Zadora (and her husband, who, IIRC, helped fund the actual GLOW) is the reason the Golden Globes stopped giving out a statue for Best Newcomer in the early '80s.
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I end up mentioning these in every space which discusses MST3K: that fabulous horror subgenre*-- Killer Pet Movies!! There’s The Pack with Joe Don Baker against killer dogs, which I already brought up in another thread. For you Killer Kitty fans, there’s Strays directed by Shaun Cassidy (don’t ask me. I don’t get showbiz). But of course, because of its all-star cast (and because it’s Canadian) the jewel in the crown** would be…
* Oh boy it almost rhymes!
**Spoiler alert: it’s not that scary unless you already hate cats. Maybe.
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Barbarella. I don’t understand why SpaceX and Blue Origin don’t upholster THEIR spacecraft with shag carpeting.
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I think this is worthy of a spinoff thread. There is so much to offer I don’t even know where to begin.
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Killer animals are sort of a hybrid of horror and disaster movies. Killer pets would be a subgroup of whatever conjoined genre we create. It’s a noble goal but I don’t think I’m organized enough to determine the official terms required for this new thread.
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Understood. Does this count even though it’s technically an escaped genetic experiment? Rifftrax has done it, but literally everyone everywhere must see it.
I know this Richard Crenna classic definitely does.
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Heck, yeah! I liked the RT take, but there’s plenty more riff potential there, if others want to go for it.
By the way, if you consider both Uninvited and Final Justice, that’s at least two Greydon Clark productions in which he appears and is then killed off 5-10 minutes into the movie. I wonder how many other times that’s happened, and if he’s subconsciously trying to warn us about the dangers of an auteur’s life. 
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It may be too awful to riff, but Kiss Meets The Phantom of the Park:
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Please someone send Joel Hodgson a tweet right now and ask him if KISS is still cool?
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On the subject of killer pets, I had almost erased the memory of this Ally Sheedy/Lance Henriksen schlocker.
And not sure whether I’ve seen this one. I’ll need to seek it out.
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Only problem with this suggestion is they’d have to cut out all the sexy parts, which is about half the movie.
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Definitely worthy of the MST3K treatment for sure.
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Munchies (1987) would be a good choice imo.
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I just watched this because I had the video game as a kid, Double Dragon (1994). Someone in the comments gave the best advice for getting through it, turn off your brain. There are plot holes a plenty, bad dialog, cheesy costumes, and some weird mood swings. If you’re in the US it’s available on Amazon Prime. Seriously, turn off your brain. Even with my brain off I was riffing it. If you watched a lot of 80s and 90s things it’s easy riffing. Acidic water that should be deadly isn’t, but it’s flammable like the sign said. Green water that looks like Slimer from Ghost Busters or the Ooze from TMNT is inside a building with no explanation. The brothers are different ethnicities. Without IMDB I’d be scratching my head trying to figure it out.
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I don’t recall much about it off the top of my head, but RiffTrax did Double Dragon earlier this year if you want to check it out.
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